Happy New Year!

Daily writing prompt
Write about your dream home.

Welcome to 2020 everyone, I’m almost caught up. The horizon looks clear, plain sailing ahead.

How witty, how droll.
Of course, it’s not the year 2020. It’s the year of the Dragon, and you know what that means? Neither do I.

In the last post I mentioned that I hadn’t yet done my annual year in review but I’ve been given a reprieve by China! Not for the first time I would imagine, but before attempting to shoehorn in my poor understanding of world economics, I will instead rise to the bait you have offered. In a cheap attempt to make life more social, not that it needs it…

I am now responding to a writing prompt offered on wordpress. Another eco system which makes no sense to me whatsoever. I understand websites but I don’t understand blogs, though I am responsible for the premier lifestyle blog in Edinburgh and the Scottish Borders TM. How can it be that I receive comments under my posts? Saying “Great blog I enjoyed readding” and “This wass lovely to read”. (See last posts). Is this a turn to AI? Are wordpress so aware of our fickle egos that they have to install an e-stroker. In all my hours online, I know where you can buy one of those for a decent price. Or wass that real? Did someone actually enjoy readding? I’ll probably never know.

What I do know is that this is home for this little premier lifestyle blog. (See what I did there?) It’s not ideal, but it is home. I pay my rent and I get on with my life quietly. I don’t ask for much or interact with many, but all-in-all I make it work. Which is why it’s so frustrating to have my peace broken. Similarly, in real life I’m living an almost ideal life. All is well. Mr and Mrs Hummels have a good thing going… except for our neighbours. They’re up late. They throw fag butts into the garden. They don’t contribute to the communal needs. But we make it work. Of course I have dark thoughts about how I can sabotage them, follow them home and make them sorry (by throwing fag butts at them drive by style). But I don’t and I keep a lid on it. (Editor – please note that fag butts are cigarette butts in Scotland. Enjoy readding.) Anyway, all these small gripes have got me thinking about moving, selling up and making our fortune. Moving to the big houses, where there are no neighbours. But would we then be missing something? Probably not. That sounds great.

Speaking of big houses. (Not as slick). I recently saw Saltburn. If you’re reading this and you’re about to watch Saltburn, don’t. Just read this. Saltburn wasn’t very good was it? I watched it not expecting to enjoy it and was almost won back, before it was really bad. The premise is so close to being nailed on but fails miserably, it lack hedonism and spite. It’s sympathetic to all the wrong people and can’t even deliver the gut punch it’s been winding up all along. A revealing montage of deception feels criminal in 2023, the year of the rabbit. This was not my ideal home.

That said, I have been spending more and more on lottery tickets in an attempt to win an inordinate amount of money with which I would buy a Saltburn-esque house. I’d certainly behave worse than those in the film. I likely will anyway, as in this year, the year of the Dragon, I will be going to Ibiza. This off the back of a trip to Amsterdam and other shames. It would appear that hedonism is quite run of the mill now and no longer fills the same role. I did wonder about these festival-esque hedonistic retreats (Ibiza, Amsterdam, Vegas etc.) while in Amsterdam however I didn’t ever follow up on the thought. If anyone has any thoughts or recommended pieces on it please send them over, I would really enjoy readding.

Anyway, also in the hedonistic vein, or nostril, was Griselda, the Narco’s follow up. This is not to be recommended. The lavish lifestyle does look enjoyable however the show is trash. Griselda is a girlboss, so is the police woman. Killing to support your family is ok if you’re a girlboss. Trash.

What was good was The Holdovers. It tread it’s own line on a fairly well worn world and managed pathos a-plenty. Which is what you want from a Christmas film released after Christmas. It put me in mind of Stoner, Pnin, Paris, Texas even and was a real treat.

Speaking of real treats, is this my finest work to date? No. Does it adequately answer some previous issues? Yes. Is it a wholesome wordpress writing prompt social love in? I’ll let you decide. I hope you enjoyed readding.

Leave a comment